No Title Yet… Just a rough draft
….I’m trying to find my happiness
it seems to have gotten lost
or
maybe it just wandered away and cant find its way back home
Maybe because too many bandages are covering the organ that is struggling to hold onto you and your stupid memories
and
i promised myself i wouldnt write another
sad
poem
but my lack of joy leaves me no choice but to become reacquainted with salty remnants that have become quite familiar with the curves of my cheeks and the cooler side of my pillow
in the latest of nights
i hate you for still having the ability to smile
i’d give every ounce of my sanity
if only it promised to bring you back to your senses and realize the damage you’ve caused
i can’t say it hurts, because somewhere along the way stroking your ego left me numb
and there wasnt enough room in my world to love you and myself at the same time
so i attempted to empty my heart until every beat pumped your life through my veins because
i wanted to feel you even when you seemed to forget your way home
i only existed, because you lived
and i only felt, because you didnt know how to
give me a reason
that your face was my reflection and your name seemed to be the only thing coming out of my mouth that made sense
because long after words failed, my mind formed vivid descriptions
and each breath i took made you hold me closer, and love me harder
at least in my mind
im trying to find myself, but that seems damn near impossible
when every cell in my body seems to be entangled with yours
and id sacrifice every dream
if only i had the chance to have a million more nightmares with you
if only i could…. (and this is when i lost the flow)
